Thursday, April 11, 2013

DIFFERENT GENERATIONS HAVE DIFFERENT PRIORITIES AND NEEDS .. BUT SOME VALUES, TRAITS, LIKE OUR DNA, ARE PASSED ON


THE METAMORPHOSIS
By
Ernie D. Delfin

DIFFERENT  GENERATIONS HAVE  DIFFERENT PRIORITIES AND NEEDS BUT
SOME  VALUES,  TRAITS AND  CHARACTER, LIKE  OUR DNA, ARE  PASSED ON

          The Baby Boomer generation, (born between 1946-1964) where this writer belongs,  is  retiring  and becoming Medicare eligible every day.  The youngest of us are almost 50 years old and the oldest are now  67 years old;  within a decade or so,  our generation  will comprise the biggest batch of retired  senior citizens, grandparents or even great grandparents  whose needs will  change that will again create a tsunami of  opportunities like they did to  many industries since the baby boomers  were in their mothers’  wombs  that will continue  until they die.
          Our pension and benefits as   senior citizens in the USA are worth the  social security taxes that we have contributed  for decades when we were working, especially if we live  long in our 90s or longer!   It is a great privilege that millions of  seniors in  the world can just dream about.    Having lived in this adopted country for  about 40 years now,   I  feel that my journey has been very  exciting and colorful.   While the  mind  is working well and the body  not substantially  depreciated,  with the senses intact,  especially my sight and hearing,   I believe  that the next decades will be equally as exciting  phase of my life as a “retiree”  whose activities are no longer “income” nor material-wealth accumulation driven but more on spiritual or self-actualization focused.  To be able to do so, is a gift in itself   from Somebody Up There.
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           A flashback.   Even after  over a half a century, however,   I  still can vividly remember  three  generations before me , since my own father’s  grandfather:   the way they worked,  the simple and frugal ways they lived,   their values and priorities.  Their  innate  traits, reputation and character  that made the village  (aka barrio)  people elect them,  from my great grandfather to my own father,  to be their “capitan del barrio”, then an  unpaid but  respected position of honor and privilege to serve,  in this farming village  of Manaoag,  Pangasinan (now a part of the newest town of Laoac) in  Pangasinan,  the  province  where the literary  Carlos Bulosan and F. Sionio Jose  and the former president Fidel V. Ramos were born. That chain was broken by me as I left the barrio after high school and did not reside there ever since.
           My grandfather’s parents , (Santiago Delfin)  the pioneers  of the Delfins from the Ilocos region in our town, was a part of that  generation that was known as the G.I.  generation, (1900-1924), which Journalist Tom Brokaw proudly called “The Greatest Generation” which I would rather call the “the “Toughest Generation”,  as they went through the Great Depression and then went to War  II to pave the way for us, the Baby Boomers, to  enjoy  the “Greatest Generation”!     Nevertheless through  hard and honest  work in the farm coupled with my great grandfather’s   innate ambition,  their economic life prospered.  During those times,   population control was non-existent   as children were the greatest resource to have more hands working in the farms,  hence, the Delfin clan multiplied with  many offsprings  compared to our  present generation.
            My grandfather (Urbano Delfin)  the oldest son of 8 brothers and sisters .  When a son got   married,  his  house was built next to the parents’s house, then the next son’s  and so on..  That also happened when my own father (Amando Delfin, belonging to the Silent Generation: 1925 -1945)  started a family, the house where I was  born (most babies  were not born in a hospital as they are now)   was built several hundred meters away from my grandfather’s  house.  So, the three sons of my grandfather had built their own  houses on a lot that became a part of their inheritance, next to each other’s.   It’s only the youngest brother of my father (my Uncle Crispin)  the only one sibling of my father  who went college who  did not build his house  when he got married because he was already  working in Manila.   From three uncles,  (just from my father’s side)  I had many cousins, many of them I don’t even know their names or ages due to   circumstances and  geography.
        As I now start enjoying playing with my very young two granddaughters, Olivia and Sofie,   I  also remember that  I was the “favorite” grandson of my grandfather Urbano Delfin, as I was the first grandson.  I did receive clandestine gifts and few pesos as additional allowances  for school, especially when  I was already going to high school, especially after commencement exercises when I was awarded Valedictorian every year.  He always told me, not to tell the other cousins, as it was a “secret” between  him and me.     I  owed a lot from  my very kind grandfather Urbano  as he  protected me  and provided the ultimate deliverance  from my father’s  dictatorial tendencies  who wanted to bring me, by force, to   enroll  at the Central Luzon Agricultural College, then,  in  Munoz, Nueva Ecija (now,   that is a part of the UP College of Agricultural like UP- Los Banos Laguna)  to become an agriculturist like one of his idols in Pangasinan.  But,  I rebelled  with the open support of an ally, my grandfather,  and instead enrolled in Letran College in  Manila to avail of a scholarship granted to me by the Dominican Fathers who were my professors in Holy Rosary Academy in Manaoag, Pangasinan.  The total severance of that parental umbilical cord from  my father was the beginning of a long but exciting   journey that eventually brought me to California, at the invitation of one of my accounting professors after  I passed the Philippine  CPA examination in the early 1970’s.   
        Three generations before mine  in Pangasinan,  can never be compared  to my own B.B. generation, nor to my daughter‘s generation (Generation X: 1965=1979) nor to my son EJ’s generation  (Millennial or Generation Y: 1980-2000) Our priorities, lifestyles, professions and standard of living have dramatically changed as we are now living in an entirely different milieu and a more materialistic society that significantly influenced our own way of life.  The generations before me lived a Spartan life, like the monks of yesteryears,  lived very simple while  they built the foundation for the next generation.  I genuinely admired and  honor them as long as I live.  They may not have enjoyed life as we  describe it  today, but they had fulfilling lives that revolved around the welfare of the  family and the common good  their society,   with regular socials  like baptismal, christening parties or funeral events that somewhat   served  as their  spiritual  gatherings or thanksgiving  as ardent believers of a  Supreme Being who provides them  good harvest and good health.    These three generations before mine never had the words “leisure and vacation” in their vocabulary, but they were very happy contented,  whereas my generation and my children’s   almost always talk about leisure and vacation  every month, if not weekly!
           My own children, who received pre-natal  care from American doctors and breathed the  American air since birth, may try  hard to understand our   own upbringing but will never fully comprehend the remarkable values and work ethic that their ancestors had  to undergo to have a better life.  Oftentimes,  they   find  our experiences “amusing or funny”  but they may never  comprehend nor feel the sting of our challenges and obstacles  that came our way.   Those experiences however made us stronger   and eventually enabled us to enjoy and savor the  sweet aroma of a  multi-spiced  cuisine  of our life’s experiences.
          Since biblical times,  each generation’s  priorities and needs are different. But the residuals of our cultural values and traits like our DNA are passed on to succeeding generation.   We are molded and became who   we are   as a result of our own particular upbringing  and experiences. These factors include  the  favorite foods that our taste buds got used to  since childhood (many Filipinos born in the USA  dislike bagoong  or balut, but for many who grew up in the Philippines the aroma of such “delicacy” excites their palate)   the music we enjoy and the movies or books  we prefer.  We are the sum total of our cumulative experiences,  influenced much by our own environment,  family culture and traditions  that are fortified by  the  company (gang)  that we surround ourselves with.  The old  “salawikain”  (sayings) from our great grandparents :  “Tell me who your friends are, and I will tell you who you are”  or  “the fruits of the tree will not fall very far from its  trunk”   succinctly  describes  the deep influence of our family environment, that becomes the fiber of our  traditional values that we unconsciously pass  on to the next generation.       
* * * *
           To illustrate a “funny but real”  day and night differences between my generation and the X or Y generation is how we, the baby boomers who are  transplanted Filipino nationals in America,  treat and save some “old treasures”   like some cassette tapes, or even  8-track players or the LP (long playing records)  or the Super 8 movie camera  that now properly  belong to the  museum. My only son EJ who belongs to the Generation Y  ( the  IPhone or Twitter generation)  wanted to just discard them, as he  claims that those things are already useless, as everything can already  be “downloaded” from the Internet!   Trivial as it may seem, it became a World-War-III- issue between him and my wife!  But as  the father-arbiter in the family:  I advised them to  “LIVE AND LET LIVE”   to keep the peace!  After all, neither is wrong nor right. It is just what it is!   The simple truth is  that we the older folks tend to be much more sentimental versus those who use the modern social tools to  communicate  like emails,  texting  or  twitter. Whereas the older generation believed and practiced “Save for the rainy days”, the younger generation believes in the YOLO (YouOnlyLiveOnce) philosophy.  As our own children are gradually defining their own generation,   we can just bring them to the river but we must and can never  force them to drink  the “water”  although we may believe that the water is good for them.
            Speaking about  personality, traits,  or hobbies,   both my daughter and son  inherited their parents’  very strong personality and fierce indendent-traits and both  like the written word as they also  love to write and enjoy being with other  people too (like me).  From my wife’s  hobbies and interests,   they also like the arts  and fine dining and eating out!   Although they are now both over 25 years old,  their traditional Filipino values (being close to the family unit)   are still very important for them.  As a matter of fact,  we are within minutes from each others  to have  family dinners  a few times a week!  Now,  that is very un-American  practice in a typical   American environment  and  culture!
          * * * *
          The perennial challenge for all generations, I believe,    is to become like the bamboo tree that is  pliant enough to bend easily   to dance with the changing winds   that  will surely come  our way.   Our needs , ambitions and dreams    change in every stage of our lives.    Everyone could  remember, for instance,  that when  we  were teenagers in  high school,   we felt    invincible and we thought   we knew it all .  In college,  we fantasized that we can conquer the world, if we were just given the  chance and  the opportunity  to do so.  Then, we graduated from  college and sooner or later, we  started working and earning a living, and for many of us  we got married and then started family.  And finally we were staring at the reality of life. For many of us, many dreams have disappeared and   some  actually stopped living as they were  just surviving.   A philosopher satirically described  that,  “some people actually died at 35 but only buried when they are 70!” 
           To my fellow baby boomer generation,  thousands of us are turning 65  every week and yes, it is still an exciting  phase  if you are relatively healthy and active in mind, body and spirit.   Two living U.S. presidents provide very good examples of this generation,   President Bill Clinton and George W. Bush who  both  reached the apex of their  professional  or political careers.   From what I read, they are  adapting very well to another phase of life,  quite different than when they were in the White House.   I believe they continue to live a fulfilling life that is now more relaxing and enjoyable than  when they had tremendous responsibilities as  presidents.  Like the other  two  living presidents, Jimmy Carter and George H. Bush, all of them have written their life story and have their respective foundations or presidential libraries  to perpetuate their legacies.   Bill Clinton  is still busy with his Bill Clinton Initiative Foundation and most likely quite preoccupied strategizing with his wife Hillary how to go back to the White House in 2016.  I bet that   George Dubya Bush is  enjoying his horse riding   in his Texas ranch  and attending his  Christian Church more often now like Jimmy Carter, who is an elder of his own Southern Christian Baptist Church.      

            So, whatever generation you belong to,   let  us adapt  to any change that  will certainly come  our way,  like our living presidents,   that will make  us  happier and  more fulfilled human beings. May   God bless our remaining years on this Earth! 
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THE METAMORPHOSIS’  FOOD FOR THOUGHT FOR TODAY:
LIFE BEGINS AT ANYTIME
By Banna Tiran
        IT IS THE AWARENESS OF LIFE’S OPPORTUNITIES WHICH WILL KEEP US YOUNG,  JUST AS IT IS THE LACK OF AWARENESS OF THE SAME POSSIBILITIES WHICH WILL MAKE US OLD.
        EVERY HOUR HAD ITS LIFETIME.  THERE CAN BE A NEW BEGINNING EVERY MOMENT.  LIFE BEGINS AT ANYTIME AND STOPS ACCORDING TO WHAT WE DO WITH IT.
          WE BEGIN   A  DAY. WE BEGIN TO SPEAK. WE BEGIN TO LEARN. YET FOR ANY ONE OF US WHO BEGINS SOMETHING TRULY SPLENDID FOR OUR LIFE, TEN OF US ARE RETREATING.  
         “LET ME BE”  WE OFTEN SAY TO LIFE.  BUT LIFE HAS A WAY OF NEVER LEAVING  US ALONE. LIFE ALWAYS GIVES US SOMEONE  TO SPARK OUR LIVES IN SERENDIPITY.  AT EVERY TURN  IT PITCHES CHALLENGES, AND AT EVERY AGE,  OUR REACTIONS ARE OF OUR OWN CHOOSINGS.
          EACH  OF US CAN BE CHILDREN AGAIN IN THE BEST SENSE.  IF LIFE DOESN’T SEEM TO SURPRISE US OFTEN ENOUGH WITH WONDERS, WE CAN STILL CREATE WONDROUS SURPRISES OF OUR OWN.  THE RESULTS OF WHAT WE DO NOW ARE THE BEGINNINGS OF WHAT WE DO NEXT.

           LET US THEN WELCOME CHANGE, JUMPT RIGHT INTO THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING  WE  THINK  MIGHT BE GOOD FOR US, EVEN  IF SUCH  THOUGHT SETS OFF EARTHQUAKES IN OUR BONES!
         SOME DAYS  IT’S NATURAL TO FEEL UNSETTLED.  WHEN EVERYTHING WE USED TO THINK WAS SOMEWHERE  ELSE,  WE CAN ALWAYS CHOOSE TO BEGIN AGAIN!
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Email:          ernie.delfin@gmail.com   and drbannatira-n@yahoo.com

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