THE METAMORPHOSIS
By
Ernie D. Delfin
DIFFERENT GENERATIONS HAVE DIFFERENT PRIORITIES AND NEEDS BUT
SOME VALUES, TRAITS AND CHARACTER, LIKE OUR DNA, ARE PASSED ON
The Baby Boomer generation, (born
between 1946-1964) where this writer belongs, is retiring and becoming Medicare eligible every
day. The youngest of us are almost 50
years old and the oldest are now 67
years old; within a decade or so, our generation will comprise the biggest batch of retired senior citizens, grandparents or even great grandparents
whose needs will change that will again create a tsunami of opportunities like they did to many industries since the baby boomers were in their mothers’ wombs that
will continue until they die.
Our pension and benefits as senior
citizens in the USA are worth the social
security taxes that we have contributed
for decades when we were working, especially if we live long in our 90s or longer! It is a great privilege that millions of seniors in the world can just dream about. Having lived in this adopted country for about 40 years now, I feel that my journey has been very exciting and colorful. While the mind is
working well and the body not substantially
depreciated, with the senses intact, especially my sight and hearing, I believe that the next decades will be equally as
exciting phase of my life as a
“retiree” whose activities are no longer
“income” nor material-wealth accumulation driven but more on spiritual or
self-actualization focused. To be able
to do so, is a gift in itself from Somebody Up There.
* * *
A flashback. Even
after over a half a century, however, I still can vividly remember three
generations before me , since my own father’s grandfather: the way they worked, the simple and frugal ways they lived, their
values and priorities. Their innate traits, reputation and character that made the village (aka barrio) people elect them, from my great grandfather to my own father, to be their “capitan del barrio”, then an unpaid but
respected position of honor and privilege to serve, in this farming village of Manaoag,
Pangasinan (now a part of the newest town of Laoac) in Pangasinan,
the province where the literary Carlos Bulosan and F. Sionio Jose and the former president Fidel V. Ramos were
born. That chain was broken by me as I left the barrio after high school and
did not reside there ever since.
My grandfather’s parents , (Santiago Delfin) the pioneers
of the Delfins from the Ilocos region in our town, was a part of that generation that was known as the G.I. generation, (1900-1924), which Journalist Tom
Brokaw proudly called “The Greatest Generation” which I would rather call the
“the “Toughest Generation”, as they went
through the Great Depression and then went to War II to pave the way for us, the Baby Boomers,
to enjoy the “Greatest Generation”! Nevertheless through hard and honest work in the farm coupled with my great
grandfather’s innate ambition, their economic life prospered. During those times, population control was non-existent as children
were the greatest resource to have more hands working in the farms, hence, the Delfin clan multiplied with many offsprings compared to our present generation.
My grandfather (Urbano
Delfin) the oldest son of 8 brothers and
sisters . When a son got married, his house was built next to the parents’s house,
then the next son’s and so on.. That also happened when my own father (Amando
Delfin, belonging to the Silent Generation: 1925 -1945) started a family, the house where I was born (most babies were not born in a hospital as they are now) was built several hundred meters away from my
grandfather’s house. So, the three sons of my grandfather had
built their own houses on a lot that
became a part of their inheritance, next to each other’s. It’s only the youngest brother of my father
(my Uncle Crispin) the only one sibling
of my father who went college who did not build his house when he got married because he was already working in Manila. From three uncles, (just from my father’s side) I had many cousins, many of them I don’t even
know their names or ages due to circumstances and geography.
As I now start enjoying playing with my very
young two granddaughters, Olivia and Sofie, I also
remember that I was the “favorite” grandson
of my grandfather Urbano Delfin, as I was the first grandson. I did receive clandestine gifts and few pesos
as additional allowances for school,
especially when I was already going to
high school, especially after commencement exercises when I was awarded
Valedictorian every year. He always told
me, not to tell the other cousins, as it was a “secret” between him and me.
I
owed a lot from my very kind grandfather
Urbano as he protected me
and provided the ultimate deliverance from my father’s dictatorial tendencies who wanted to bring me, by force, to enroll at the Central Luzon Agricultural College,
then, in Munoz, Nueva Ecija (now, that is
a part of the UP College of Agricultural like UP- Los Banos Laguna) to become an agriculturist like one of his
idols in Pangasinan. But, I rebelled
with the open support of an ally, my grandfather, and instead enrolled in Letran College in Manila to avail of a scholarship granted to me
by the Dominican Fathers who were my professors in Holy Rosary Academy in Manaoag,
Pangasinan. The total severance of that
parental umbilical cord from my father
was the beginning of a long but exciting journey that eventually brought me to
California, at the invitation of one of my accounting professors after I passed the Philippine CPA examination in the early 1970’s.
Three generations before mine in Pangasinan, can never be compared to my own B.B. generation, nor to my
daughter‘s generation (Generation X: 1965=1979) nor to my son EJ’s
generation (Millennial or Generation Y:
1980-2000) Our priorities, lifestyles, professions and standard of living have
dramatically changed as we are now living in an entirely different milieu and a
more materialistic society that significantly influenced our own way of life. The generations before me lived a Spartan
life, like the monks of yesteryears,
lived very simple while they
built the foundation for the next generation.
I genuinely admired and honor
them as long as I live. They may not
have enjoyed life as we describe it today, but they had fulfilling lives that
revolved around the welfare of the
family and the common good their
society, with regular socials like baptismal, christening parties or funeral
events that somewhat served as their spiritual gatherings or thanksgiving as ardent believers of a Supreme Being who provides them good harvest and good health. These
three generations before mine never had the words “leisure and vacation” in
their vocabulary, but they were very happy contented, whereas my generation and my children’s almost always talk about leisure and vacation
every month, if not weekly!
My own children, who received pre-natal care from American doctors and breathed
the American air since birth, may try hard to understand our own upbringing but will never fully
comprehend the remarkable values and work ethic that their ancestors had to undergo to have a better life. Oftentimes,
they find our experiences “amusing or funny” but they may never comprehend nor feel the sting of our
challenges and obstacles that came our
way. Those experiences however made us
stronger and eventually enabled us to
enjoy and savor the sweet aroma of a multi-spiced
cuisine of our life’s experiences.
Since biblical times, each generation’s priorities and needs are different. But the
residuals of our cultural values and traits like our DNA are passed on to
succeeding generation. We are molded
and became who we are
as a result of our own particular upbringing and experiences. These factors include the favorite foods that our taste buds got used
to since childhood (many Filipinos born
in the USA dislike bagoong or balut, but for many who grew up in the
Philippines the aroma of such “delicacy” excites their palate) the
music we enjoy and the movies or books
we prefer. We are the sum total
of our cumulative experiences,
influenced much by our own environment, family culture and traditions that are fortified by the company (gang) that we surround ourselves with. The old
“salawikain” (sayings) from our great grandparents : “Tell me who your friends are, and I will
tell you who you are” or “the fruits of the tree will not fall very
far from its trunk” succinctly describes the deep influence of our family environment,
that becomes the fiber of our traditional values that we unconsciously pass on to the next generation.
* * * *
To illustrate a “funny but
real” day and night differences between
my generation and the X or Y generation is how we, the baby boomers who are transplanted Filipino nationals in
America, treat and save some “old
treasures” like some cassette tapes, or
even 8-track players or the LP (long playing
records) or the Super 8 movie
camera that now properly belong to the museum. My only son EJ who belongs to the Generation
Y ( the IPhone or Twitter generation) wanted to just discard them, as he claims that those things are already useless, as
everything can already be “downloaded”
from the Internet! Trivial as it may
seem, it became a World-War-III- issue between him and my wife! But as the father-arbiter in the family: I advised them to “LIVE AND LET LIVE” to keep the peace! After all, neither is wrong nor right. It is
just what it is! The simple truth is that we the older folks tend to be much more
sentimental versus those who use the modern social tools to communicate
like emails, texting or twitter. Whereas the older generation believed
and practiced “Save for the rainy days”, the younger generation believes in the
YOLO (YouOnlyLiveOnce) philosophy. As
our own children are gradually defining their own generation, we can
just bring them to the river but we must and can never force them to drink the “water”
although we may believe that the water is good for them.
Speaking about personality, traits, or hobbies,
both my daughter and son inherited
their parents’ very strong personality
and fierce indendent-traits and both like the written word as they also love to write and enjoy being with other people too (like me). From my wife’s hobbies and interests, they also like the arts and fine dining and eating out! Although they are now both over 25 years
old, their traditional Filipino values
(being close to the family unit) are
still very important for them. As a
matter of fact, we are within minutes
from each others to have family dinners a few times a week! Now, that
is very un-American practice in a
typical American environment and culture!
* * * *
The perennial challenge for all
generations, I believe, is to become like the bamboo tree that is pliant enough to bend easily to dance with the changing winds that will surely come our way.
Our needs , ambitions and dreams
change in every stage of our lives. Everyone could remember, for instance, that when
we were teenagers in high school,
we felt invincible and we thought we knew it all . In college,
we fantasized that we can conquer the world, if we were just given
the chance and the opportunity to do so.
Then, we graduated from college
and sooner or later, we started working
and earning a living, and for many of us we got married and then started family. And finally we were staring at the reality of
life. For many of us, many dreams have disappeared and some actually stopped living as they were just surviving. A philosopher satirically described that,
“some people actually died at 35 but only buried when they are 70!”
To my fellow baby boomer
generation, thousands of us are turning
65 every week and yes, it is still an
exciting phase if you are relatively healthy and active in
mind, body and spirit. Two living U.S.
presidents provide very good examples of this generation, President Bill Clinton and George W. Bush who
both
reached the apex of their professional
or political careers. From what
I read, they are adapting very well to
another phase of life, quite different
than when they were in the White House. I believe they continue to live a fulfilling
life that is now more relaxing and enjoyable than when they had tremendous responsibilities as presidents.
Like the other two living presidents, Jimmy Carter and George H.
Bush, all of them have written their life story and have their respective
foundations or presidential libraries to
perpetuate their legacies. Bill Clinton is still busy with his Bill Clinton Initiative
Foundation and most likely quite preoccupied strategizing with his wife Hillary
how to go back to the White House in 2016.
I bet that George Dubya Bush is enjoying his horse riding in his
Texas ranch and attending his Christian Church more often now like Jimmy
Carter, who is an elder of his own Southern Christian Baptist Church.
So, whatever generation you belong
to, let us adapt to any change that will certainly come our way,
like our living presidents, that
will make us happier and
more fulfilled human beings. May God bless our remaining years on this Earth!
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0 ------
THE METAMORPHOSIS’ FOOD FOR THOUGHT FOR TODAY:
LIFE
BEGINS AT ANYTIME
By Banna Tiran
IT IS
THE AWARENESS OF LIFE’S OPPORTUNITIES WHICH WILL KEEP US YOUNG, JUST AS IT IS THE LACK OF AWARENESS OF THE
SAME POSSIBILITIES WHICH WILL MAKE US OLD.
EVERY
HOUR HAD ITS LIFETIME. THERE CAN BE A
NEW BEGINNING EVERY MOMENT. LIFE BEGINS
AT ANYTIME AND STOPS ACCORDING TO WHAT WE DO WITH IT.
WE
BEGIN A
DAY. WE BEGIN TO SPEAK. WE BEGIN TO LEARN. YET FOR ANY ONE OF US WHO
BEGINS SOMETHING TRULY SPLENDID FOR OUR LIFE, TEN OF US ARE RETREATING.
“LET
ME BE” WE OFTEN SAY TO LIFE. BUT LIFE HAS A WAY OF NEVER LEAVING US ALONE. LIFE ALWAYS GIVES US SOMEONE TO SPARK OUR LIVES IN SERENDIPITY. AT EVERY TURN
IT PITCHES CHALLENGES, AND AT EVERY AGE,
OUR REACTIONS ARE OF OUR OWN CHOOSINGS.
EACH
OF US CAN BE CHILDREN AGAIN IN THE BEST SENSE. IF LIFE DOESN’T SEEM TO SURPRISE US OFTEN
ENOUGH WITH WONDERS, WE CAN STILL CREATE WONDROUS SURPRISES OF OUR OWN. THE RESULTS OF WHAT WE DO NOW ARE THE
BEGINNINGS OF WHAT WE DO NEXT.
LET
US THEN WELCOME CHANGE, JUMPT RIGHT INTO THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING WE
THINK MIGHT BE GOOD FOR US,
EVEN IF SUCH THOUGHT SETS OFF EARTHQUAKES IN OUR BONES!
SOME
DAYS IT’S NATURAL TO FEEL
UNSETTLED. WHEN EVERYTHING WE USED TO
THINK WAS SOMEWHERE ELSE, WE CAN ALWAYS CHOOSE TO BEGIN AGAIN!
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Email: ernie.delfin@gmail.com and drbannatira-n@yahoo.com
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