THE
METAMORPHOSIS
by
Ernie D.
Delfin
My column
for this week is a transcript of my speech
delivered before the UCI Sage Scholars of the University of California,
Irvine (UCI) on February 7, 2012, about LEADERSHIP.
“BECOMING A
LEADER : THE HEART
AND SOUL OF LEADERSHIP”
Thank you for the kind introduction, Melissa. Thank you for this rare privilege to speak before this s SAGE Scholars of the University of California, Irvine. My speaking before you tonight is indeed a great honor that came totally unexpected as a priceless gift, especially considering my personal and peculiar background. I still vividly remember my early years in the USA, before all of your were born, when I was a controller of a big hospital in Los Angeles, when I went to the company’s Speech Pathologist, and asked: “Dr. Jones, I always wanted to improve myself to be able to succeed in this country, how do I get rid of my accent? And the wise doctor said, Ernie that is very easy to do, JUST GO BACK HOME TO THE PHILIPPINES!” …. But I never went back home to stay , except a dozen or more vacation trips to the land of my birth.
For you to appreciate more with what I will share you tonight, with your indulgence, please allow me to briefly tell you about myself and the million miles journey that I have travelled the last half a century of my life, up to this conference hall where we are gathered now by your kind invitation.
I was born in
a farming village where there was no electricity until I was in the elementary
grades when one of the most visionary
presidents of the USA, Pres. John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas in that
fateful Friday of November 22nd, 1963.
My family was neither very poor
nor very rich, but we worked very hard
from sunrise to sunset in our desire to have a better life. My parents believed as we did at a very young age that only good education can improve the life that we were
born into. I was the first person
in the whole village to finish college
by going to school at night and working during the day time. Eventually I became a CPA and my
former professor in Advanced
Accounting recruited me to work in his
accounting and management firm in Los Angeles.
That was in the mid 1970s, when
your parents were probably in high
school or college too.
Unlike many of
you, I worked extra hard to prove not
only to myself but also to my
professor who took chance of hiring
me that he did not make a mistake
of bringing me to America. And
above all, to make my poor parents proud of me and for my
brothers and sisters to have a
role model.
After a year in
California, I enrolled at the Cal State
University-Los Angeles, which was only about 15 minutes away from my work at
that time, for my MBA. That helped me significantly to be
acculturated faster in America which
also contributed greatly to my own success in this land of opportunity where real work and
determination are justly
rewarded.
After ten years
in America, I also involved myself in a few chosen
organizations outside work and church.
In the l980s, I was also very active in the Jaycees, the Junior Chamber
of Commerce or Jaycees, for short, and our CPA Society. I eventually joined the Rotary International, where I have been very
active the last l5 years. (Ask more about Rotary from your friends who are
members of the Rotaract Club of UCI, that I founded about 4 years ago, when I
was the Youth Director of the Newport Irvine Rotary Club that still meets at your University Club every Thursday
noon. To know more about Rotary, go to www.rotary.org, or simply contact or email me anytime.)
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With that
condensed background, let me proceed
to my assigned topic about
“BECOMING A LEADER: THE HEART AND SOUL OF LEADERSHIP”
Who is a leader? Mr. Webster defines a leader as “one who commands or leads or
guides others” or “one who has influence or power.”
For
just a few moments, let me now
invite to close your eyes to visualize more profoundly
this scenery:
Light
a match in a dark room and watch as the light instantly overcomes the darkness.
Observe the power and grace of that single, solitary flame dancing with life.
Now light several candles or kindle a fire and experience the added warmth and
comfort extending from that first, vulnerable flame through others.
This is the heart and soul of leadership - the essence of inspiring others.
It is about courageously casting off fear, doubt and limiting beliefs and giving people a sense of hope, optimism and accomplishment. It is about bringing light into a world of uncertainty and inspiring others to do the same. This is what we call passion, the fire within.
Passion is a heartfelt energy that flows through us, not from us.
It fills our hearts when we allow it to and it inspires others when we share it. It is like sunlight flowing through a doorway that we have just opened. It was always there. It just needed to be accepted and embraced. Under the right conditions, this "flow" appears effortless, easy and graceful. It is doing what it is meant to do. It is reminding us that we are meant to be purposeful. We are meant to be positive. We are meant to be passionate. We feel this when we listen to and accept our calling in life. We feel it as inspiration when we open the door of resistance and let it in.
Inspiration springs forth when we allow ourselves to be "in-spirit," aligned with our true essence. Stop and think about it: When you feel truly passionate and inspired about someone or something, what frame of mind are you in? What are you willing to do? What kind of effort are you willing to put forth? How fearful are you? Chances are, you feel motivated to do whatever it takes, without fear or doubt, to turn your vision into reality. You grow in confidence. You believe you can do it. You are committed from the heart and soul. (Paraphrase from the writings of John J. Murphy)
This is the heart and soul of leadership - the essence of inspiring others.
It is about courageously casting off fear, doubt and limiting beliefs and giving people a sense of hope, optimism and accomplishment. It is about bringing light into a world of uncertainty and inspiring others to do the same. This is what we call passion, the fire within.
Passion is a heartfelt energy that flows through us, not from us.
It fills our hearts when we allow it to and it inspires others when we share it. It is like sunlight flowing through a doorway that we have just opened. It was always there. It just needed to be accepted and embraced. Under the right conditions, this "flow" appears effortless, easy and graceful. It is doing what it is meant to do. It is reminding us that we are meant to be purposeful. We are meant to be positive. We are meant to be passionate. We feel this when we listen to and accept our calling in life. We feel it as inspiration when we open the door of resistance and let it in.
Inspiration springs forth when we allow ourselves to be "in-spirit," aligned with our true essence. Stop and think about it: When you feel truly passionate and inspired about someone or something, what frame of mind are you in? What are you willing to do? What kind of effort are you willing to put forth? How fearful are you? Chances are, you feel motivated to do whatever it takes, without fear or doubt, to turn your vision into reality. You grow in confidence. You believe you can do it. You are committed from the heart and soul. (Paraphrase from the writings of John J. Murphy)
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Many leaders have
contributed greatly to make our world a
better place to live like Abraham Lincoln,
Mahatma Gandhi , Mother Teresa or
Nelson Mandela but there are
also some leaders that made the
opposite, like Hitler, Napoleon and
Emperor Hirohito who was implicated in
the bombing of Pearl Harbor in 1941 that
led to World War II.
There are thousands
of books about leaders and on leadership.
Just google leaders or leadership and you will read countless of
personalities or articles about them.
When you read history, you are standing on the shoulders of the authors
and can learn much. You will read also about different kinds of
leaders and styles of leadership. For instance,
when you visit a museum, like the
Museum of Tolerance about the Holocaust,
you will learn about the destruction of human lives led by a misguided
leader, yet you also will read that the heroism of other leaders sprung from
such tragedies. (I am just
curious, how many of you have visited that historic museum in West Los Angeles,
just about an hour from Irvine?)
There are
political leaders, aka politicians, like George Washington, Abraham Lincoln,
Harry Truman, John F. Kennedy of yesteryears.
There are also military leaders, like Patton, Cromwell
or McArthur. There are also
religious leader, like Jesus
Christ, Mohammad, Luther or the Pope.
In every phase of our lives, you will meet and read about
leaders in business, politics, religion,
education, organizations, or even
in IT or even in entertainment and music. IT, business or entertain you find leaders.
As a long time
student and now a businessman, I am
always reading the biographies of many men and women who made a difference
in our world. Lately, although I am not an IT person, I am
fascinated by the lives of Bill Gates,
Steve Jobs, Face book founder, Mark
Zuckerberg . Irvine is also the
seat of so many visionary leaders, like the Chairman of the Irvine Company,
Donald Bren, who had the vision of
donating the land where your university
now stands with one condition to make it a campus of UCI, a very wise and strategic investment that
contributed greatly to the success of the Irvine Company. Our county is full of many visionary
companies like Disneyland and research and development
corporations like Allergan, Baxter that
make the economy of our county more vibrant and diversified as opposed to Las Vegas or Detroit.
Millions of young
people in the world can just dream to be where you are
today. You are indeed very lucky and a winner in so many ways. But if you
are not seriously taking that as a great advantage to make a difference
in your world, where you soon become its
leaders, you will not become an effective leader and may not have a very meaningful or
fulfilling career in the future. So, my challenge to you, is please do not
squander your God’s blessings as I hope
that in the future you can also share your success in leading others to a better future.
Your university also has many leaders. In most of
its departments are successful leaders in their respective fields, especially
in sciences, research and medicine. The
UCI College of Law that just started in
2009 and now is gaining a national reputation with the hiring of its first dean, Erwin Chemerinksy (who spoke before our Rotary Club of Newport
Irvine when he was just arrived in
Orange County) Also, a Rotarian friend of mine, Dr. Raj Desai, the first Chief Hematologist of the UCI
Medical Center many years ago, told us stories that he witnessed happening
in OC 50 years ago. He has shared with us that he was
one of the first Indian nationals who came to the United States as a full scholar. His journey started in a huge ship, called
the Queen Mary, that is now docked as a hotel-conference room in Long Beach.
Dr. Desai is almost 90 years old now, but
still enjoying his life in a beautiful and expensive house in Balboa Bay
that serves as his “backyard”. Those
are very fascinating stories, from which
one learns a lot, without much research
and reading. Every factual
information or knowledge that you
get from
others will give you some extra-yards- advantage over your
competitors in the real life.
Even in your own
family, you can find your kind of a
leader who can be your role model or inspiration to become the best you can be. Even at my age, I still find some leaders, my own role models
to become a better person. Even in my church,
there are great leaders (as there are also not so good leaders in my
dictionary) In our Rotary
organization, I am in awe learning what other leaders do in
their lives, always thinking how they can make a difference in the lives of
others. Collectively, these
leaders have somewhat influence me also to become a more
effective leader and a better human being.
You can do that too,
my dear friends… You do not look very far to find somewhat worth emulating who can provide you some proven formula to
become more successful, to become a winner in the field that you so choose to
belong, and in the process to become a
leader in your own right.
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Now, let me briefly describe and suggest to all of
you, some ACTION WORD, active verbs for you to consider as you
continue your education and prepare your own career or profession in this great
land of opportunity. I pray that 10, 20
or 30 years from now, you too become a leader who can provide a good role
models for others to follow.
Last night, I just made up this acronym: L E
A D E R:
L = LOVE WHATEVER YOU DO… LEARN
as much as you can about that field or endeavor. If you want to be a doctor, go find dozens of doctors that you can learn
from, nor from rappers or basketball players or
musicians. Be an intern in a
company…. While learning new things
however, be always open as your first
“love” may just a stepping stone of
another greater love. For instance,
although I was a licensed CPA, it didn’t give me the fulfillment that I dreamt for myself, so I left the accounting
industry and became an entrepreneur and
engaged in marketing which I think suited my personality more than
a boring accounting job. However,
that background in accounting and finance also gave me extra points ahead from my competitors
in the real estate and mortgage industry
for over 25 years.
E = EXCEL IN SOMETHING THAT YOU
WANT TO BE A LEADER.. Exceed the expectations of your boss. There is a saying
in business “Under promise and Over deliver.
But don’t just do activities ONLY for money but also other things
for the greater good in the community.
Give back to your community, as
much as you can along the way.
A= ACCUMULATE RELEVANT EXPERIENCES
THAT WILL PROPEL YOU TO YOUR DREAM.
Accumulate also personal contacts along the way… You never know when you
needed them. That’s why I strongly
recommend you to consider to join Rotaract (while in college) and when you can
afford to join, Rotary International, where
you will know your fellow
Rotarians by first name basis. (For example: Dr. Arun Ganhi,
the grandson of Mahatma Gandhi.. (who autographed his book for us when
we went to hear him speak in Palm Springs last November)… or Bill Gates who gave RI $255 M dollars for poverty
alleviation and malaria and polio eradication in the world. Rotary
International, founded in 1905, is now in over 200 countries with 535 Rotary
Districts (one is Orange County) and has over 1.25 million members. As young
adults, you have opportunities to become
full Peace Scholars or exchange students in one country for several months or several years. If you
are interested, explore those possibilities.
Again, you can get those
informations in our www.rotary.org website or contact me.
D - DISCIPLINE
YOURSELF… DELIVER YOUR BEST IN WHATEVER YOU DO…
Discriminate the kinds of friends you hang with, the TV shows you
watch. There is a saying that says
“Tell me who your friends are, and I
will tell you who you are!” Also
discover and nurture your strengths and follow where your passion is. Practice your skills. Even a great basketball
player, like Kobe Bryant, who lives in Orange Coast, by the way, practices his craft regularly with
discipline.
Do not
just become like these relaxed rubber bands (while throwing them a
handful of rubbers to the audience) that
are totally useless until they are stretched and just have the right tension to hold something of value…. Be a DIFFERENT in a positive manner, from the guys or girls next door.
Be
that leader likened to the goose in
front of a flock of Canadian geese flying in formation in their seasonal
migration to warmer places.
E-
ENERGIZE YOURSELF .. AND
BECOME LIKE AN EAGLE… “LEADERS ARE LIKE
EAGLES, THEY DON’T FLOCK
YOU FIND THEM ONE AT A TIME…. The
trait of an eagle will make you stand out anywhere.. when you are looking for a
job or even in the community of your peers.
Attend and listen to as many speakers who are accomplished and leaders
in their own right. Many of them come to
your university as invited guest speakers.
Several times, I have come to UCI
Bren Hall to listen to great speakers, like the Dalai Lama and Sir Richard Branson, founder of Virgin Airlines and many others. Listening to others who have done great
accomplishment can inspire you to become more successful person too.
R = READ BOOKS
and find your own ROLE MODELS….
Watch movies that can only entertain you but learn much. Gandhi is just
one example.. Now showing in local
theatres is “IRON LADY”, starring
Meryl Streep about the life of Margaret
Thatcher. Or some movies like “The
Bucket List”, starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman are good movies that
touch on the finer essence or meaning of
life. Another one is “The Way”
starring Michael Douglas about a doctor’s journey to find the meaning of his
life. The Good Book says that “For
where your treasure is where your heart will be!” Each one of us has that hidden “treasure”
but it is us, us alone, who must
find and discover it. Once you found it,
nurture and develop it to its fullest potential Then, treasure it forever for your own life’s happiness and fulfillment.
I believe a long time ago that there are only the two
most important factors that determine your success in life are: GOOD BOOKS that
you read, and the PEOPLE YOU ASSOCIATE with more frequently. And these
things will not happen by accident but by critical choices throughout
your life.
SOONER OR
LATER, you too become successful in whatever you do,
and without even asking for it, you will be asked to lead others… and
that is the reward of all your efforts, perseverance and determination to
become the ‘Salt of the Earth’ to be a
person of substance that is recognized
by your peers for whatever you really are.
Life is a gift from your God (or Allah, or whatever name you call him)
but what you do with your life is your gift to God. So don’t waste it.. make it worthwhile and useful to enhance the
quality of life of your fellow human beings.
Last but not the
least, I would like to leave you a challenge
or some kind of self-evaluation quiz differentiating the
characteristics of a LEADER
VS. MANAGER, which you can apply not only to
yourself but also on your own professors or bosses at work or in
any organization that you belong to. It
goes this way: in school
A LEADER CREATES. A MANAGER COPIES.
A LEADER GIVES CREDIT. A MANAGER GIVES BLAME.
A LEADER INCITES DESIRE. A MANAGER INCITES FEAR.
A LEADER VALUES PEOPLE. A MANAGER VALUES
PROCEDURES .
A LEADER EXPECTS
INNOVATION. A MANAGER
EXPECTS CONFORMITY.
A LEADER PREFERS JUDGEMENT. A MANAGER PREFERS RULES.
A LEADER EXPANDS LIBERTY. A MANAGER EXPANDS POWER.
LEADERS EMPLOYS
PEOPLE. A MANAGER
EMPLOYS OBJECTS.
A LEADERS WELCOMES
CRITICISM. A MANAGER
WELCOMES PRAISE.
A LEADER PROMOTES
OTHERS. A MANAGER PROMOTES HIMSELF.
A LEADER MAKES MISTAKES. A MANAGER MAKES EXCUSES.
A LEADER SEES OPPORTUNITY. A MANAGER SEES PROBLEMS.
A LEADER CORRECTS HIMSELF. A MANAGER CORRECTS OTHERS.
A LEADER ACQUIRES WISDOM. A MANAGER ACQUIRES KNOWLEDGE
A LEADER DEVELOPS PRIDE.
A MANAGER DEVELOPS EGO.
A MANAGER WANTS RESPONSIBILITY. A
LEADER WANTS RIGHTS.
A LEADER SEEKS A
JOB. A
MANAGER SEEKS A POSITION.
A LEADER SEES
THROUGH MIRROS. A SEES HIS OWN IMAGE.
A LEADER HAS FAULTS. A MANAGER IS
PERFECT.
PEOPLE LOVE TO BE LED.
PEOPLE HATE TO
BE MANIPULATED
LEADING IS EXTREMELY
DIFFICULT. MANIPULATING IS
EASY.
YOU MAKE YOURSELF A
LEADER. ANYONE CAN MAKE YOU A MANIPULATOR.
and my all-time favorite…
YOU LEAD PEOPLE! YOU MANAGE THINGS!
NOW, TAKE A
DEEP BREATH, THEN
HONESTLY ANSWER TO THE GUY IN THE MIRROR,
ARE YOU A
LEADER OR JUST A MANAGER?
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